Blended Family Series

Welcome to the Blended Family Series

My path here hasn’t been a straight one—it’s been what I call a broken road. (Yes that old country song is now playing in my head.)  I’ve walked through the pain of divorce, the hope of remarriage, and all the messy, beautiful moments in between. As both a clinical psychologist and someone living in the midst of a blended family, I see this journey from two angles: the professional lens and the deeply personal one.

Some days are filled with laughter, connection, and small victories that feel like milestones. Other days are hard—ugly, even—and bring tears I didn’t expect. Through it all, I’ve learned more about love, resilience, and adaptability than I ever could have from textbooks or training alone.

If I’m honest, there are moments I wish I’d had more tools, clearer guidance, and a roadmap to help me navigate this unique family terrain. That’s exactly why I’ve started the Blended Family Series—to share insights, strategies, and real-life stories that can help other families find their way.

Whether you’re just beginning your blended journey or you’ve been walking it for years, my hope is that these posts will offer you encouragement, practical tools, and the reassurance that you are not alone.

Understanding the Different Types of Blended Families~

Part 1 of the Mended Feather series.

By Dr. Dawn Emmett Bishop, Ph.D., Clinical Psychologist

Blended families—sometimes called stepfamilies—are becoming increasingly common in today’s world. While the term “blended” often evokes an image of two separate elements merging into butterflies and rainbows, a harmonious whole, the reality can be more complex and cloudy. As a clinical psychologist who works extensively with families, I’ve learned that “blending” takes time, patience, and, most importantly, understanding the unique structure of your family.

Below, I’ll walk you through the different types of blended families, why they form, and how each dynamic can shape relationships. Recognizing your family’s type is not about labeling—it’s about gaining insight into the challenges and strengths you might encounter.

Stepfamilies After Divorce

This is the most familiar form of a blended family: one or both partners enter a new relationship after divorce, bringing children from the previous marriage.

• Common Strengths: Opportunity for children to witness healthy adult relationships after a separation; shared understanding between partners about the complexities of co-parenting.

• Typical Challenges: Divided loyalties for children, managing ongoing relationships with ex-partners, and differences in parenting styles.

• Therapist’s Note: Consistency in rules across households (as much as possible) and open communication help children feel secure.

Stepfamilies After the Death of a Partner

When a parent remarries after losing a spouse, the blending process often involves layers of grief.

• Common Strengths: Potential for deep empathy and mutual support within the family; opportunities to honor and remember the deceased parent.

• Typical Challenges: Children may feel replacing a parent is “betrayal”; loyalty conflicts may be particularly strong.

• Therapist’s Note: Allow space for grief alongside new relationship growth—these emotions can coexist.

Cohabiting Blended Families

Not all blended families are formed through marriage; many couples choose to live together without formally marrying.

• Common Strengths: Flexibility in family arrangements; less pressure from legal or societal expectations.

• Typical Challenges: Ambiguity about roles and responsibilities, especially if legal rights are unclear.

• Therapist’s Note: Define roles and household responsibilities early—ambiguity breeds conflict.

Mutual Children Blends

Some blended families include children from both partners’ previous relationships and children they have together.

• Common Strengths: A rich mix of relationships and sibling bonds; shared experiences as new parents.

• Typical Challenges: Balancing attention between stepchildren and biological children; navigating perceived favoritism.

• Therapist’s Note: Intentional one-on-one time with each child helps prevent feelings of exclusion.

Complex Blends Across Multiple Households

Sometimes, the web is even more intricate—both partners may have children with more than one previous partner, creating several active co-parenting arrangements.

• Common Strengths: Large support network; opportunities for children to develop adaptability and resilience.

• Typical Challenges: Logistical complexity, conflicting rules, and potential competition between households.

• Therapist’s Note: Family calendars, clear communication, and predictable routines are invaluable here.

Step-Grandfamilies

When older adults remarry later in life, adult children and grandchildren may also become part of the new family unit.

• Common Strengths: Opportunity for expanded family bonds and shared traditions.

• Typical Challenges: Negotiating holiday traditions, inheritance concerns, and differing expectations for involvement.

• Therapist’s Note: Acknowledge that traditions may need to evolve—invite all members to help shape them.

Final Thoughts

Every blended family is unique. While clinical categories can help us understand patterns, they should never box a family into a fixed identity. What matters most is how each member feels seen, heard, and valued.

Blended families can thrive when they:
• Practice empathy as a daily habit
• Communicate openly and respectfully
• Accept that trust and closeness develop over time

Remember, “blending” is a process—not a single moment. The most successful blended families I’ve worked with recognize that they’re building something new together, not simply merging old pieces. And with patience, understanding, and intentional connection, the result can be even richer than what came before.

On August 29th, we will be having Part 1 of the Blended Family Series. Click here to sign up: https://forms.gle/SLw1EQSzyzqw4qgV9